I briefly touched upon the subject of vulnerability on an Instagram post, but it’s something that has been on my mind for a while.
There are few things scarier than admitting your insecurities and realising what it is that makes you far from perfect. But isn’t that also what is so beautiful about being human?
I took a month off from looking at social media, posting anything on my blog and just let everything be. I was kind of deciding where I want to take my blog, what I want to post about, and figuring out goals that I need to work towards in order to live the life that I want to. A couple of outfit posts in and I already got a little bored of only writing “what I wore” posts. As much as I do love clothes and fashion and how it makes me feel, there is so much more that I want to write about.
I’m sure that everyone overthinks. It’s just a fact of life. Some do it more than others, but everyone does it to some extent. And that overthinking doesn’t do anyone any good. When it comes to my blog, I overthink. I overthink to the point where it hinders me posting anything. I love styling clothes and sharing where I got pieces (hello, can we talk about this bag I have here?! It cost me next to nothing and I get so many compliments on it!), but I also want to talk about wider topics like being insecure and showing my vulnerable side to really connect with people. And for some reason, my overthinking led me to believe that I couldn’t do both.
On the introvert scale, I’d say that in my natural state I’m probably around a solid 8… I don’t really open up and more often than not, I find that connection hard to create. But I know so intensely in my heart that this is something that I want to work on. Life isn’t just going through things alone, it’s finding people to go through it with and being someone’s crutch when they are in need too.
Posting photos of bright sunny days and showing my outfits is something that I enjoy sharing on my blog, but there are times when there needs to be more. Like right now, when I want to talk about opening up and being vulnerable. Not playing up to the social media hype of having a ‘perfect’ life. There is just no such thing.
Last month did prove to be quite difficult. It was my third month of being in Sydney, and as much as I was having a good time and enjoying my life here, I still had no job and no direction. And it’s sort of why I had to get off social media for a while. It was getting too easy to compare my life to others and feeling like crap about it, whilst receiving comments and messages about how fun life was looking in Sydney. It felt almost fraudulent.
Seeing the other side of it and feeling the struggle, I needed a break.
Coming back on here with fresh eyes and a new perspective, I feel like I have a better vision of what I want, and more importantly, what I need. Social media is quite an integral part of my life, and I enjoy using it. It’s just having a better understanding and being able to see wider issues when necessary.
I’m also making peace with the fact that I may not be where I want to be, or where I thought I would be at this age. And it’s okay. As long as you try your best to be a good person, help those around you, pursue a positive outlook and keep moving forward, it’s going to be okay. Just gotta stop being so hard and putting so much pressure on situations that are out of your control. It’s only life, and we are here for such a short amount of time, there’s no point wasting it.
If you have made it this far, thank you for reading. x